The Longest Day

Today I had to go on the hardest drive any pet owner ever needs to go on. I cried the whole way, and so did Taurus. He was so sick the past couple days though, and he had given up…and I can't blame him. It was the right decision to let him go with dignity, as the king he was (and always will be.) It doesn't fill the massive hole that's left in my heart right now though.

He was the best little man anyone could have ever asked for. He came from so much abuse and neglect, they found him on the street living under the thruway, giving him his name Freeway at the SPCA. We got him at the beginning of June 2002 when he was just over a year old. He weighed 35 pounds, you could see his ribs, and he was sick then too…throwing up in our house right away. He was terrified that we were going to take him back to the SPCA for doing that, but I just told him "it's okay, I have a bad stomach too, you're in the right place, cause we get it here." My heart was totally captured when he kissed me on the nose then, and it became his little way to say "I love you" to me.

Taurus was pushy, but in the totally cute and wonderful way. If he wanted to be pet, you would get hit. I can't begin to say how many times he punched me in the face just for a tummy rub. He knew what he wanted, and he wouldn't stop until he got it. He was so smart. I know everyone says that about their dog, but let's face it, there are some dumb dogs out there. Taurus though…you could have a conversation with him, and he would answer you and listen intently. And those eyes…you really truly believed that he understood every word that you said.

That's what Taurus taught me. That life can give you shit sometimes, like it did for his first year before he chose to come live with us. But if you keep fighting and pushing for what you want, you will get it, and it will be wonderful.

I pet him all night last night practically. We snuggled the whole time. He had toast and marshmallows for his last little meal…two of his favorites. When it came time, he knew it. We got to the SPCA, and one of the women there told him "you had a family that really loved you, didn't you? You were a really lucky guy." And he wagged his tail, saying "yes, I really did, and I love them too." I gave him his last hug, told him to be a good boy in heaven and that I loved him, and he kissed me on the nose before turning away to go with the veterinarian tech into the back. He came into my life like a king, and he left like one too, and for that I'm grateful.

And now, here I sit, curled up with his blanket that I can't bring myself to wash. On and off sobbing and laughing at funny things that he had done. When I was putting away his bandanas, of which he had a ton, I swear I saw him in the doorway wagging his tail wanting to know which one he'd be wearing today. Thinking that now he would give me a look like "come on, knock it off with the crying already you crazy girl!" And always that kiss on the nose that was our thing…our I love you.

RIP Taurus. May the fields be green and full of rabbits for you to stalk, may there be endless potato chips, cookies, and marshmallows for you to eat, may you win every race you enter up there, and I'll see you when I join you up there one day…when we can kiss each others noses again.

Taurus Katonka T. (May 2, 2001 - April 28, 2014) 

We will always love you, Little Man!