Pre vs. Post (One Year)

It's been almost a year since I've been gluten free. I didn't really notice much of a difference in my face or anything until this year's birthday party this past weekend. Comparing it to pictures of last year...I just look so much more...alive. Bright and shiny. And no, it's not just the glasses. Take a look for yourself:

Me in May 2010...while still eating gluten and feeling basically like crap. Little to no energy, and this was about as much as I could smile and act happy.

Me in May 2011...feeling much better. See that smile? It's the smile of a gluten free girl with energy and pep, able to keep up with life and everyone around her!

"the list"

It's been a really long time since I've posted an entry on here. Gone are the days of Kiwibox where I posted every day and freaked out if there was no entry. I figured out tiny little things to put up on there, even if it was just a few words. I miss that...but there's just not enough time in a day anymore.

The list came out for cuts for the upcoming school year. NYS is going through a major budget crisis, and our "lovely" governor has decided "hey...let's take money away from kids and give it to rich people instead!" Great idea, huh? So even the district I'm teaching in now, which has been known as one of the "safer" districts to be employed by, is going through massive cuts. Needless to say though, by the grace of God, I'm somehow safe. I seriously think Bob, my department chair, and the principal pulled every bit of weight they had to keep me. Bob's going to be teaching IB classes in 2012-2013, and he'll need someone to teach the AP biology classes...my Masters Degree in Gifted Education definitely helps for that. Plus, Joe is going to be retiring around then too, and they know that I'm interested in continuing the Anatomy and Physiology classes if given the opportunity. So yeah...I'm safe with a job for next year. Whew! I really do love it there...feel like I've gone full circle to be back teaching in the school I went to. I hope, like the principal said, this is the place I'll stay at.

reflections on 2010

It was, well...an interesting year. Doesn't even seem like a full year has gone by since last New Year's to be honest. Time really does fly by, even though some days feel like forever.

Let's see...2010. What did you hold?

• The worst New Year's of my life. I had never felt so alone at midnight in my entire life as I did that time...this year is not going to be a repeat!
• Finished my LTS at Alden and then subbed per diem there through the rest of the year.
• Went to Toronto with mom to see the King Tut exhibit at the AGO, learning that a facial mask is more fun than shopping with her.
• Learned that some districts/superintendents will lie through their teeth to get the cheapest candidate, and then they always come crawling back to try to get the better one.
• Spent another week in the hospital which involved being slapped by a doctor and refusing to see two others ever again.
• Finally got diagnosed with what's been wrong with me my whole life...celiac disease.
• Started my job at KE...which has had all of its own ups and downs.
• Gone on an awful blind date that will forever live in the record books. "Good luck in all of your future travels" indeed!
• Finished up my Masters degree...marking the point where if I truly wanted to be done with school, I could be. (But I'm not...)

So what does 2011 hold? What resolutions am I making?

• No more pop...well, my mini goal is to make it up to Valentine's Day before having another glass. It's 3:42pm now on NYE, and I have one more glass to finish off from the bottle and then all of it is gone out of the house. The only exception will be a bit of ginger ale when I have a really bad stomach ache.
• More fruits and veggies and less refined sugar (e.g. ice cream and candy.)
• Join a gym and actually go at least once a week (ideally more, but well...starting small here!)
• Pay off my one credit card with the highest balance so they can stop harassing me for only paying the minimum. This I fear will take the most discipline out of all the resolutions...

Wishing you all a very happy and blessed New Year!

in a land called Narnia...

When my brothers and I were little...there were certain videos that we always rented from the library. "Cirque du Soleil" videos, anything "Star Wars", and the animated "The Chronicles of Narnia." We would watch them, and then pretend we were in them. We were circus performers, Jedis fighting off the dark force, and warriors in Aslan's army against the evil White Witch. To me then, they were just nice stories...fabulous places where you could escape to for an afternoon.

I didn't read "The Chronicles of Narnia" complete set until I was in my early twenties. I absolutely adored them...they're my favorite books out there to be completely honest. The imagery, the beauty, the truth behind the story. I knew the background of the books...that they're the child's version of "The Bible"...and that made them all the better for me. The first book as the creation story, that as Aslan sings louder and louder and louder, more and more is created and formed. The battles of good versus evil, temptations, overcoming personal evils in seeking the good. The last book being the book of Revelation, only not as scary...like I said, child's version. The Pevensie children were like my brothers and I...fighting like normal kids do, but sticking together through thick and thin. Lucy seriously is my favorite character in a book...for her simple belief and faith in things. She is sweet, smart, and so willingly believes without needing to see...she's a beautiful character.

And then Disney started to make live-action films based on the books. "The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe" came out. I cheered when Santa Claus appeared (and still get misty eyed when Lucy turns to Susan and says "told you he was real.") I hooted and hollered when I saw griffins on the good side...which if I could have any mythical pet in the world, that would be it (never mind the fact that Golden Griffins are my alma mater's mascot.) I couldn't help but smile and feel safe when Aslan appeared. "Prince Caspian" came out a few years later, introducing us to a real-life (well...computer animated) Reepicheep. It wasn't as good of a film, and I cried my eyes out when the group literally got slaughtered in Peter's failed attempt at storming the castle. But when the trees came to life again, helping Aslan's army win against the bad guys, I cried again.

"The Voyage of the Dawn Treader" came out yesterday, and of course mom and I went to see it. Talk about beautiful. It's one thing to read the books and imagine it in your head, but this is one movie where it lived up to my imagination. And when they reached Aslan's Land, and brave little Reepicheep begs entry, knowing that he's not worthy, but getting to see it with his own eyes because he made it...I was crying with the best of them. They didn't show it to us, but just based on faith alone, it needs to be absolutely beautiful beyond anyone's imagination. Watching sweet Lucy and brave revived Edmund say goodbye to the land of Narnia because they gained everything they could from it, I cried.

I can't imagine a world without Narnia...even if it's not a real land. It's a state of mind...a belief...a fabulous place where animals can talk, where mythical creatures exist, and where a lion is king. It's a place where child-like faith rules, showing us that we should all strive to be that way. Because when you get down to it all...faith is all we have.

is it really so hard to believe?

Yesterday I went to dinner with a large group of friends. No really, I mean large...as in took up an entire side of Applebees large. We ranged in ages from 10 through 60. This occurs every Monday night, but I'm rather picky about when I'll go. Okay, to be realistic, I've had class every Monday evening for ages, so that definitely hinders things, not to mention the lack of an official gluten free menu there. I'm terrified of those kind of things still, because who wants to be sick for Thanksgiving? Not me. But anyway...

When I got up to leave at 8:15pm to make the twenty minute trek back home to my poor little dog who twisted his foot, one of the older guys asked why I was leaving so early. I said that I have school in the morning, to which he asked "what time is school?" I answered that I had to be there at 7am, and he was appalled, wondering what college course starts that early. When I told him that it's not me going to school, that I'm educating the future of tomorrow, he didn't believe me. Now, I've known him for a few years now...I've been going for this whole teaching thing since 2007...don't believe me? I had to explain to him how I teach 10th grade Living Environment to a bunch of kids that I love (though who love to give me a constant run for my money.) He still didn't believe me for a while...

Am I really not the "teacher-type?" Is there one?

Sure, if you would have told me five years ago that I was going to be a teacher, I'd have laughed in your face telling you that it couldn't be true. I had it stuck in my mind that it would be doctor or bust, no matter how foolish it seemed. And foolish it was...because now that I'm teaching, you couldn't pay me to do anything else. It's fun! I absolutely love it, even on the days that I want to come home crying. Seriously! Sure, a ton of work, definitely not a 9am-5pm job, frustrating at times, time-consuming grading and lesson planning and calling students' homes (for good and bad.) But when you're up at the front of a classroom, watching students who aren't seeming to get it all of a sudden reach the corner, and when they turn around that corner, everything comes into the light for them and "oooooo, I get it now" takes over...it's awesome. When the students confide in you, trusting you enough to share their problems and joys with, asking you for advice for their own futures...that's fabulous too. It's a completely satisfying and exhilarating yet frustrating and maddening job all at the same time with little respect. But when you think back on your life, you can describe the good ones no matter how long ago you went to school. Can you do that with the top football or hockey player from twenty years ago? Or what about the most influential business people? Nope...but teachers you can.

There's a poem...pretty much sums it up...